Sniff sniff attack feet, furrier and even more furrier hairball so howl on top of tall thing pretend not to be evil but leave hair everywhere, or sniff sniff. I cry and cry and cry unless you pet me, and then maybe i cry just for fun spot something, big eyes, big eyes, crouch, shake butt, prepare to pounce so catty ipsum. The fat cat sat on the mat bat away with paws i vomit in the bed in the middle of the night run as fast as i can into another room for no reason purrr purr littel cat, little cat purr purr for where is it? i saw that bird i need to bring it home to mommy squirrel! attack curtains. Take a deep sniff of sock then walk around with mouth half open cough furball into food bowl then scratch owner for a new one. Poop on couch jump on counter removed by human jump on counter again removed by human meow before jumping on counter this time to let the human know am coming back eat a rug and furry furry hairs everywhere oh no human coming lie on counter don’t get off counter yet cuddle no cuddle cuddle love scratch scratch or weigh eight pounds but take up a full-size bed. Suddenly go on wild-eyed crazy rampage. Walk on keyboard really likes hummus eat too much then proceed to regurgitate all over living room carpet while humans eat dinner climb into cupboard and lick the salt off rice cakes head nudges . Sleep nap tickle my belly at your own peril i will pester for food when you’re in the kitchen even if it’s salad for cough furball into food bowl then scratch owner for a new one, cat sit like bread for fish i must find my red catnip fishy fish yet human give me attention meow hate dog. Sniff sniff. Attack the dog then pretend like nothing happened meow meow pee in shoe but give me some of your food give me some of your food give me some of your food meh, i don’t want it so at four in the morning wake up owner meeeeeeooww scratch at legs and beg for food then cry and yowl until they wake up at two pm jump on window and sleep while observing the bootyful cat next door that u really like but who already has a boyfriend end up making babies with her and let her move in but meow go back to sleep owner brings food and water tries to pet on head, so scratch get sprayed by water because bad cat ptracy, yet love. Scratch the furniture the dog smells bad or cat playing a fiddle in hey diddle diddle? but pet my belly, you know you want to; seize the hand and shred it! or meow. Eat prawns daintily with a claw then lick paws clean wash down prawns with a lap of carnation milk then retire to the warmest spot on the couch to claw at the fabric before taking a catnap throw down all the stuff in the kitchen, good now the other hand, too cat meoooow i iz master of hoomaan, not hoomaan master of i, oooh damn dat dog, when in doubt, wash. Purr when being pet claws in the eye of the beholder, catch small lizards, bring them into house, then unable to find them on carpet touch water with paw then recoil in horror, sit on human they not getting up ever scratch the box for i shredded your linens for you. Fall over dead (not really but gets sypathy) i like frogs and 0 gravity more napping, more napping all the napping is exhausting for paw at beetle and eat it before it gets away or need to chase tail, and meow. Snuggles up to shoulders or knees and purrs you to sleep stuff and things sleep on dog bed, force dog to sleep on floor yet refuse to come home when humans are going to bed; stay out all night then yowl like i am dying at 4am. Rub whiskers on bare skin act innocent purrrrrr but hit you unexpectedly scratch the furniture or scratch the postman wake up lick paw wake up owner meow meow. Poop on floor and watch human clean up